5 Ways to Make a Great First Impression
Written by Cara Hale Alter Thursday, September 13 2012
Tips to Help Project Confidence and Earn the Respect of Others
You only get one chance to make a first impression. Most first impressions are made in the blink of an eye when someone first meets you. For this reason, it’s important to project credibility and confidence from the first second you step into the door.
No matter what you’re selling, whether it’s your business plan or your latest product, at the end of the day you’re selling yourself. You have to project credibility and trustworthiness in order to succeed and close any deal. Whether or not you like it, others will be judging you based on how you look and act even more than what you say itself.
What sets apart the winners from the losers in these situations?
Through my work with thousands of clients, I’ve found that there are 25 specific auditory and visual cues that affect how you’re perceived. Even more importantly, all 25 of these cues are under your control through practice, and can be the difference between closing the deal or walking away empty handed.
1. Listen Actively
Your credibility can be won or lost when you’re simply listening. Do you look bored or disconnected—or respectfully engaged? Attentive listening means you’re an active partner. It’s not enough to pay attention; you have to look like you’re paying attention. Keep your posture open, your head up, and your navel pointing toward the speaker.
Practice Tip: Next time someone is speaking to you, imagine someone else is grading you on your behavior and your body language. Are you engaged, energized and active, or are you passive, closed and distant? Would you pass the test, or would you be sent out to grab some coffee?
2. Maintain Eye Contact
Writer Takayuki Ikkaku says “Eye contact is the best accessory.” In order to build rapport and trust with another person, it’s important to make eye contact with the person speaking to you. Otherwise it looks like you may have something to hide. However, it’s not enough to just sporadically look the other person in the eye. For best results, hold it for three to five seconds.
Practice Tip: If you truly feel uncomfortable or uneasy looking the other person in the eye, practice looking at other people not directly in their eyes, but rather into their eyebrows. Most people cannot tell the difference between you looking directly in their eyes or actually between their eyes. Even then, hold for three to five seconds, and then look away to the left or the right briefly before you come back to your spot. It’s important not to stare or linger too long because you might make the other person uncomfortable.
3. Keep Your Hands in the Box
In poker, a “tell” is a sign that gives away whether you have a strong or weak hand. Some people straight up frown or smile, while others may blink or scratch their head. Similarly, your physical gestures with your hands can give away a great deal to others in meetings and presentations. The Clinton Box shows a good region where to keep your hand gestures in. As a general rule, keep your hands above your waist, between your shoulders, and below your chest.
Practice Tip: When you’re nervous, your mouth will likely be engaged, but your body language won’t be. To portray confidence to others, get your hands in the game immediately by reaching out to your audience and interact with your gestures. Record yourself speaking. If your mouth is moving, so should your hands (within the box).
4. Use Your Big Boy Voice
If you’re a Seinfeld fan, you surely remember the infamous “low talker.” Likewise, in business settings a common problem with volume is speaking too softly or dropping volume at the end of sentences. The good news is that volume is the easiest vocal skill to adjust. First, however, you must know the difference between adequate volume and optimal volume. Most people err on the side of merely adequate. If you want to be a powerful voice, speak with a powerful voice.
Tip: Reminiscent of the infamous “low talker” from Seinfeld, volume control can often be a common problem in business settings. Some people feel that the louder you speak, the more powerful the impact is. However, it’s important to find the sweet spot to not overwhelm your audience yet make sure they can properly understand what you’re saying. As a general rule, speak with a louder voice if you’re unsure, because a soft and wavering voice will project inferiority and shyness.
5. Keep a Level Head
The Dog Whisperer Cesar Millan prides himself on his “executive presence.” Dogs recognize that he’s the alpha dog based just off his posture and the way he carries himself. In business, it’s important to literally be levelheaded. Don’t raise or drop your chin, which can appear aggressive or submissive, respectively.
Practice Tip: Straighten your back and keep your head level. Now move just your head, much like a camera placed firmly on a tripod, and scan left and right with your head level. Make sure to not let your shoulders twist, because even this subtle movement can portray inferiority.
The next time you have a big meeting or big presentation, practice and follow these 5 simple tips to success. While this may seem like fairly straightforward advice, I can’t stress enough the importance of these small and subtle techniques. No matter how much you may have prepared and know your stuff, unless you portray confidence and authority, you will not earn respect from others. It could very well be the difference between landing new investors at your next pitch, or heading back to the drawing board.
Cara Hale Alter is president of SpeechSkills, a San Francisco–based communication training company, and author of The Credibility Code: How to Project Confidence and Competence When It Matters Most (Meritus, 2012). For more information, visit TheCredibilityCode.com.